Pageant Auditions
April 12 @ 1:00 pm – 3:00 pm
Little Theatre of Fall River is seeking 7 men for various leading roles; 6 are portraying female contestants.
Auditions: April 12, 1–3 PM and April 13, 6–8 PM
Show dates: July 9–19
Please prepare an uptempo song that shows off your vocal range and personality. Accompanist provided, and video submissions are acceptable.
The characters are over the top in almost every way, but rooted in a strange, personal sense of their own reality. Skills in broad comedy are a plus.
Roles (age ranges are 18 and over)
MISS BIBLE BELT, RUTH ANN RUTH – Believes that she, plus God, equals a majority in any situation. She sees even the cheesiest part of the Glamouresse Beauty Regimen as part of His Plan. This gives her an unshakably righteous attitude, but she also has the manic cheerfulness of the newly saved.
MISS DEEP SOUTH, LAURINDA SUMMERFORD – The Southerner in the show; even though others may have fabulous hair, only she knows how to work it. At the same time she is The Lady. She has a very narrow and ritualized sense of “femininity,” which is frequently outraged by the other contestants’ behavior and attitudes. She is exceedingly funny in her passive-aggressive Southern attitude.
MISS GREAT PLAINS, BONNIE LOUISE CUTLETT – Utterly sincere in her belief in the values promoted by Glamouresse, though some of them seem quite exotic to her. She is honored to represent the great heartland of this nation and to show what honest country folk can do. In the present contest she is agape and aglow. Not necessarily the “prettiest” contestant.
MISS INDUSTRIAL NORTHEAST, CONSUELA MANUELA RAFAELLA LOPEZ – Included among the regional winners mostly due to Glamouresse’s belated sense that “the times they are a-changin’” and the Northeast’s notable lack of interest in the contest. She is feisty. Her talent has been culled from watching the variety show Sabado Gigante on Spanish television.
MISS TEXAS, KITTY-BOB AMES – The professional of the group. With her father’s money and a shrewd selection of contests, she has never lost a competition. Her skills may not be outstanding by themselves, but her attitude says “Winner” all the way.
MISS WEST COAST, KARMA QUINN – Like Miss Great Plains, she is sweet-natured, but Karma is a lot less focused. She has tried to parlay her vagueness and “I’ll try anything once” attitude into a comprehensive mystical spirituality, but it hasn’t gelled. This pageant is the most structured event of her entire life.
FRANKIE CAVALIER – Our genial host is certainly that. Frankie is a celebrity who is known to the audience where the pageant is being performed, perhaps as a weekend weather-report reader or a spokesman for a used car dealership. Think Martin Short meets Bert Parks meets Regis Philbin meets Rip Torn. Strong singer who moves well.
